Reprinted from Huff Post, Weddings

Sharon Naylor Bridal Guide expert; Author

While the idea of getting a super-pricy wedding element for free sounds fabulous, some wedding freebies are to be avoided at all costs: unwise ‘cheap-outs’ usually turn into wedding disasters. Like Uncle Charlie, who promised to shoot your wedding video for nothing, then didn’t get any footage of your First Dance because he was outside talking on his cell. Or Aunt Sally’s homemade wedding cake that melted and crashed to the ballroom floor because she didn’t know to put supports inside it. Or Grandma slaving over a hot stove during your cocktail party, a sweaty mess with burns on her hands…and still not churning out pigs in blankets fast enough for your crowd.

With the average wedding cost soaring over $20,000 these days, every bride out there is looking for ways to save on her wedding budget, while still having the perfect dream day. And, scarily, there are some brides out there who go way too far with the price-cutting, inviting catastrophes with the ultra-regrettable theory “If it’s free, it’s for me.”

But free is a dangerous game when it comes to your wedding. There are just some things you should never try to get for a big, fat $0 in your wedding budget spreadsheet. Because the adage is true: you really do get what you pay for. And it gets worse: some freebies with $0 attached lead to huge expenses when you have to undo the disaster, if not utter heartbreak when your day is ruined.

Here are eight wedding freebies to avoid:

1. Free Photos and Video: Pro photographers and videographers have top-quality equipment and editing prowess, and they know how to be everywhere during your wedding, capturing every magical moment. Uncle Charlie isn’t trained in the art of wedding photography and video and is likely to be at the bar. You don’t want to end up with 75 photos because Uncle Steve thought that was plenty, or all of your ceremony photos gone because he messed up his upload. You won’t miss any important footage or photos with a pro on your side.

2. Free Catering: Pro caterers know how to create a menu that pleases all of your guests, and they have the best suppliers for top-quality ingredients. They know how to perfectly time their food prep so that the filet mignon is pink in the middle, and your phyllo cup apps come out hot and tasty — not charred or cold. Grandma shouldn’t have to play “Top Chef” for your wedding, and you definitely don’t want to have the food run out a half hour into your cocktail party. An amateur could food-poison everyone, and create that ‘where’s the food?’ nightmare during your celebration. The artistry, timing and skills of a caterer are all-important now.

3. Free Wedding Coordination: If you have a friend who’s planned her own wedding, that doesn’t make her a trained professional. Accepting her offer to plan your wedding for her ‘portfolio’ (since she now wants to be a wedding planner) is like having someone who once cut their own hair cut yours the day before your wedding. Event planning takes a lot of expertise, and the greatest wedding coordinators know all the best vendors, sites and suppliers in town. They can lead you to the best and away from the worst. So don’t be someone’s practice wedding. Stick with a pro.

4. Free Wedding Gown Alterations: I don’t mean the free alterations offered at your gown boutique. I mean your aunt’s offer to alter your gown, since she makes her kids’ clothing. Freebie alterations just don’t work, since the fabric of most gowns is slippery and challenging, best left to expert hands. Freebie jobs leave you with fallen hems, split seams, and bulges in your dress that guests will think are bulges in your body.

5. Free Beauty Treatments: The Kardashian sisters might wax each other, but waxing, bleaching, self-tanning, facials and other beauty treatments conducted by a friend — to save money — will almost surely send you right to a salon for an expensive fix, as well as ripped skin in the worst places, breakouts, streaky tans and other disasters, especially bad if it’s just days before your big day.

6. Free Entertainment: Let your brother’s garage band stay in the garage. Only trained and experienced deejays and bands know how to read a crowd to adjust their playlist and keep the dance floor packed. They also have top technology with backup equipment to prevent any potential problems with the music.

7. Free Wedding Cake: Don’t wind up with a messy, gloppy-sided nightmare that looks like a teen made it in Home Ec. Hot days pose softening challenges for cakes, and tall cakes need the proper dowel-inserted support…not to mention a safe and experienced ride to your wedding site. Pro bakers can work magic even on a budget cake, and get it to you in perfect condition.

8. Free Anything From a Bridal Show Drawing: Without checking the company out fully first, that is. Some truly excellent professionals display at bridal shows and expos, offering free photography packages, free tuxes, free entertainment, and more for big-ticket wins if your ticket is drawn. But some beginners or shady types may be there, too. Never accept a free anything, no matter how big a value placed on it, without investigating the company, meeting with the owners in their shop, viewing their products, and — important! — asking your other vendors if they know that company and trust them. Those free tuxes could be 10 years old, frayed, over-rented, ill-fitting and made from crappy fabric. So treat that win as an invitation to check the company out thoroughly before you sign anything. You can always throw out that freebie voucher and avoid a wedding nightmare.

So where do good wedding freebies come from? Quality pros include terrific ones in their wedding packages, and top wedding coordinators and floral designers often have cases of pretty votives and lanterns in their store rooms. They’re all too happy to give them to you, when they like you. So hiring vendors is the best way to score some great freebies, and putting your wedding into experienced, accredited hands is beyond priceless. Other freebies can be décor items borrowed from recently-married friends, or found for the asking at your wedding site (like outdoor couches and tables, or bistro tables, candelabras, and more.)

Make it your philosophy to score smart, disaster-free freebies, and you’ll find lots of little $0s in your wedding budget adding up to a surprisingly and delightfully large amount, helping you achieve your dream wedding for far less than expected.

Sharon Naylor’s new book is “The Bride’s Guide to Freebies: Enhancing Your Wedding Without Selling Out.“

Autumn is a great time to have a wedding at Carl House.  An autumn theme brings with it the feeling of warmth and the opportunity to bring rich and warm colors to your party. Colors rich in tones of orange, brown, burgundy, forest green and bronze are wonderful colors that help set the feel of the wedding. 

You might consider using flowers such as roses, sunflowers and mums with any type of greenery and vines. Bring elements of the outside inside by using nuts, acorns, pine cones and greenery on reception tables. 

You might consider using sashes on chairs and candlelight to wrap up the room with glowing warmth…..colors of the season.

  Ask our Carl House Team for more tips on how to make your autumn wedding a glowing success.

Financial health in a relationship is key as it can affect all other areas of your life.   While your first year of marriage is an important ‘getting to know you’ time for you and your spouse, it’s key to be on the same page when planning your financial future together. Our financial team at Carl House put together this list of financial tips for you and your spouse to consider during your first year of marriage and beyond.

1. If you both work, you might consider putting in a certain amount for sharing costs, housing, cars, groceries, utilities, etc., and then having separate checking accounts to spend other money you earn for whatever you prefer.  If you share the same checking account, decide how financial decisions are made and when you need to consult with one another.
2. A great practice is to account for every penny you spend in a given week, on the random soft drink you buy, groceries, incidentals.  It’s empowering to know EXACTLY where your money is going!
3. The key to building wealth, don’t spend more than you have.
4. Make a budget and most importantly, stick to it.
5. Establish credit for yourself through a mortgage or credit card which you pay off monthly.
6. Put 10% of what you earn in some savings or investment vehicle.
7. Make long range wealth building plans.  Where do you want to be in five years financially and how will you get there?
8. Seek out the advise of money counselors through workshops and classes.
9. Keep your credit clean: It’s very important to make sure that you pay your bills on time.  Late payments can damage your credit score which you want to keep high and meticulous.
10. Agree on how you spend and what you spend on with your spouse.  How do you handle the purchase of ‘big ticket items’.
11. Remember that a credit card is not money, it’s a loan.  Pay credit cards off each month to avoid additional charges.
12. Empower yourself and be sure that both you and your spouse involve yourself in financial decisions and planning. 
13. Robert Kiyosaki has some wonderful books on money management and visioning.  Go to Amazon.com to learn about his ‘Rick Dad, Poor Dad’ book series.
14. Though you might be young, it is never too soon to plan investments and create a will.

Money is one of the key areas where couples argue, so make plans BEFORE you get married on how you will handle this important part of your relationship, the business aspect of your relationship.  Here’s to your prosperity.  Best wishes from the Carl House Team

From an absolute authority….Kelsey Banes Boggs, our very own Carl House Wedding Director who had her wedding not so long ago, (yes, AT Carl House)! and who masterfully assists our many brides every weekend at CARL HOUSE….below some tips to help you smooth the road to your BIG DAY!  Thanks Kelsey!

Now You’re Engaged…..a Few Do’s and Don’ts

DO!!!!

• Take time to celebrate! There’s no need to plan your wedding in a day.

• Look at venue possibilities together online to compare pros and cons.

• Make a list of questions to ask each venue.

• Look at wedding blogs for inspiration.

• Start thinking about colors for the wedding, how formal you want the wedding and reception to be, etc.

• Think about what your spending plan is.

  

  DON’T

• Pick your bridal party immediately or feel like you have to include all of your friends- pick close, supportive people who will make your life easier.

• Decide on any “big ticket” items without communicating with each other first.

• Get frustrated. Planning a wedding should be fun!

  

Tips to Stay Organized During Planning Process:

• Get a 3 ring binder and tab dividers to keep vendor contracts and information organized.

• Make a free email account just for the wedding (ex: boggswedding@gmail.com).

• Keep color swatches together in a Zip Loc bag.

• Bring a notebook and take good notes during vendor meetings.

• Keep pictures of items you purchase for the wedding on your phone for quick and easy reference.

• Create a folder on your computer just for wedding files to help keep them organized.

• Organize wedding items as you go along- don’t let everything pile up!

• Decide on a group of friends to help set up décor at the venue the day of- you and your bridal party will be busy getting yourselves ready!

• Make a weekend-of schedule that you can email out to your bridal party and family so they know what is going on and when. It will save you from having to make tons of phone calls!

• Make an Excel form to track your guest list, their contact information, RSVPs and if you have sent thank you cards for gifts. It’s a great way to build an address book for holidays and special occasions.

Photo: Sarah Eubanks

Hot Trends and Tips for Brides and Grooms:

• Colors other than black for bridal party suits.

• Bridesmaids pick dress and style from a specific color scheme, but do not match each other.

• Specialty linens for extra table emphasis.

• “Dance Party” music for bridal party introductions.

• Specialty cars instead of limos for grand departure.

• Dessert stations instead of groom’s cake.

• Actions stations for guests to visit during lunch/dinner service.

• Photobooths and candy stations as favor and activity for guests during the wedding.

• Activities during reception: “shoe game,” anniversary dance, dance-offs, etc.

• Bridal shoes that are flat and fun-colored- no more painful heels!

 

Photo: Sarah Eubanks

 

Photo: Sarah Eubanks

And a Few MORE Tips:

• Do a “first look” to maximize picture time and reduce stress before ceremony.

• Have a private meal so that you get to enjoy dinner and have time to visit with guests once you are done.

• Make a list of pictures for the photographer to take so you don’t have to remember it the day of.

• Ask your vendors for help and suggestions- they’re the experts!

• Select the menu that best matches your taste- your guests will eat whatever you serve and will appreciate the individuality.

New video of the February 2012 Bridal Event

With over 15 years of experience in the floral industry Lindy is a talented floral designer with a passion for creating beauty with the use of flowers.  Her talent and artistry shines through with each of her creations. She loves meeting with clients, especially brides, working to make their wedding dreams come to life through the use of colorful and fragrant floral decor!  “There is nothing I love more than seeing a bride’s vision come to life!”

For Carl House brides making the bouquets may be her favorite, but she is becoming a big fan of the pomander (Kissing Balls).  “My goal is to give the brides what they want, and still stay within their spending plan.”

“There are so many options when it comes to florals at an event.  Beyond the bouquet, I love decorating the ceremony site with floral color and fragrance.  Lining the ceremony aisle has also become a huge trend in the industry.  I love my job as each client and each floral creation is unique and new, making my job such a joy!  When I show a bride her bouquet and she begins to cry because it more than exceeds her expectations and she hugs me tight……. that is my greatest reward.”

Lindy would be delighted to meet with you to learn how she can create the perfect floral accents at your special event! Please contact her at florals@carlhouse.com

Take a few minutes and enjoy the video below.

Just 10 months ago and a second chance our paths crossed, we started as friends seeking that special someone and quickly realized our search was over. With strangely similar interests and strong values we progressed our courtship into a love affair. We enjoy time on the beach, walks in the park and sharing an El Jinete meal after church at 12 Stone.

Family and friends are an important part of our life together. We stumbled upon Carl House one Sunday and after an awesome Valentine engagement dinner agreed that it’s a top choice for the ceremony!

We are looking forward to the wedding and feel very blessed to be building a future as one.

Thanks for sharing it with us so far.

Adam and Chris

The ring is on your finger and you said ‘I will’.  Once your plans are set in stone and the timing is right it’s a great idea to send a save the date card.  This is a pre-invitation mailing that announces your wedding date and let’s your guests know they are invited giving them the opportunity to do a little preplanning by scheduling a day off, saving extra bucks or possibly making travel plans from lodging to transportation.

It’s a good idea to send the card around six months prior to the wedding.  Only send the card to those you really want to attend the wedding. Its good etiquette to send an invitation to those who let you know after receiving the save the date card and invitation.

sample from weddingpaperdivas.com

The card can be formal or informal, that is a matter of personal taste. The card could be on a pretty card and read something like:

There’s no turning back now!

I still remember, even though it was over 25 years ago, thinking through the process of buying the shoes I would wear on my wedding day.  Being a creature of comfort that was my first consideration but I also knew I wanted everything to be as beautiful and perfect as it could be from head to toe.  I had to take into consideration walking down the aisle, posing for photographs, greeting guests, and the reception. This added up to more than 12 hours on my feet!

So I decided to go with both Glamour and Comfort.  I bought two pairs of shoes and changed them out about halfway through the day. This is one time you don’t want to necessarily bargain buy, the odds are your feet will not be happy, nor will you.

I still use this concept today if I know I will be on my feet for an extended period, I have a pair of shoes to change into sometime during the day.   

Now on your mark get set, go shoe shopping!

Hello all!

I hope everyone else’s planning is going well and that you all enjoyed a week filled with family and food!

I FINALLY ordered my invitations and couldn’t be happier with the result! I held off on ordering them for so long because it was the one thing I really didn’t have a clue about. Being a wedding director has its perks for the day-of tasks, but everything that has to be done leading up to the “big day” is a huge mystery to me like everyone else!

Luckily, the company I ordered the invitations through has a wonderful customer service line. I was able to call and speak with a representative who filled out my complicated order form with just the right wording. He even corrected me on having a ceremony at five o’clock in the “afternoon” instead of “evening!” Just to have peace of mind, I ordered proofs to be sent to my email for review.

Once I finalized my order, I received the invitations about four business days later. A couple of chick flicks, and tons of junk food later, my sister and I had all of the invitations set to be addressed and mailed!

Be sure when preparing to send your invitations to take one by your local post office to have it weighed. Most invitations will require extra postage, and the last thing you want to do is send out invitations only to receive them back a day later! While you’re at the post office, remember to buy postage for your response card envelopes (remember to make it easy for your guests to send a response to you!).

I’m cutting it a little close, but I am glad to have the weight of invitations almost off my shoulders!

I hope everyone had a fabulous (and filling!) Thanksgiving week! We’ll see if I still fit in my dress at my first fitting after a few slices of my mom’s scrumptious pumpkin pie!